In Memory.

As memorial day approaches my mind can only grasp two things. One that on Saturday I am leaving to California with Chance & his entire family!! I am so excited!! Two I just think about my grandpa. It's a special day where we spend some time as a family decorating his grave with flowers, flags, & pin wheels of course, after taking a weed whacker to the edge of the grass since we all know he liked a nice looking lawn. There are flags placed in a row with the name of every person in the cemetery who have passed who served in the military along with a permanent list of the names of those who served. Such a honor to the sacrifice he made to serve long ago. This day usually makes you feel pride. Pride for who you lost being honored & remember, followed by tears, then the sharing of memories that brings more tears mixed with laughter & smiles. 

Yesterday I spent a few hours looking through old pictures & realizing how lucky I am. I have caught myself feeling jealous of my old cousins who had my grandpa at their graduations & weddings. Seeing him hold his great grand kids. I know I will never have pictures like that. But the sweet thought that enters my mind when I think about this is my children are up in heaven with him right now. He watches over me & when they are bought upon this earth he will be here to watch over them as well. He is watching over his entire family & he is with us constantly. Even though we may not know it I can tell you it's true because I felt it in the temple when I got married. Even though we can't see him he is there & he loves us. Russel M. Nelson once stated in a talk that: "Loving relationships continue beyond the doors of death and judgment. Family ties endure because of sealings in the temple. Their importance cannot be overstated."

It may feel weird to visit his grave & have a one sided conversation with a head stone. But the promise of knowing that loved ones that have passed see who visits their grave. You leave with that happy thought knowing he was watching, he saw you, & he was there. I will admit I had a hard time at first going to his grave. It finalizes it that physically he is gone. Death is a hard thing to grasp even though everyone deals with it numerous times in their life time. I haven't even brought myself to visit my best friend Sean's grave because it's still too hard. Death will always be sad but somehow eventually, despite your best efforts not too, you still keep on living. Our loved ones would be furious at us if the loss of them is effecting us living our lives especially when they know, & we know that we will see each other again. Knowing that we have an eternity of happiness waiting for us after we pass on from here. In reality they probably feel bad for us having to still live down here since i am quite positive heaven is awesome:] That is the only thing that makes life worth living when someone dies. I don't know what my life would be like if i didn't believe in such a thing. 

All I want to do is make my grandpa proud & I hope I am doing an okay job at that. I want my kids & my grand-kids to remember me when I am gone. To remember all the memories we share & the love that I had for them. I want them to be proud of their family & remember loved ones who have passed. If I am half of who my grandpa is, then I will have done my job. Anyways I could go on & on about this amazing man with a million pictures so I thought for the sake of time I could do something better. At work I made a short slide show of some of these photos just to express the point of living for your lost loved ones. Living on in their memory. Taking time to enjoy the little things & remember the memories made that will never be forgotten. 

I love you grandpa Shepherd & I will always remember you. With a kiss & an eye roll:]
(I'm not sure why the slide show uploaded so little. I picked the biggest option for the video. Oh well.)

Mornings with Austin

I have the privileged of always watching my little brother when my parents are out of town. This month I have had him two weekends in a row. He generally stays over at my house when my parents are gone because I have to open up our printing shop at nine & get him to school so it's just easier for me. Sometimes he is really good at getting himself up & getting ready when I ask him. But every once in a while I have to fight him. Let me mention that this is THE LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL before summer. As he woke up this morning he came to lay in my bed for a few minutes & told me, "I think I have a kinked neck". I had promised my mom he wouldn't talk me into letting him stay home. About fifteen minutes later he walked into my bathroom as I was getting ready & said, "I think I have a pus pocket in the back of my throat do you have a flashlight?" So I looked & couldn't see anything. I just kept telling myself to stay strong. I even had to text Chance for some moral support. I am a sucker for Austin. I will literally do anything he ask me to do. He is just so dang cute I can't resist!! As he was coughing & clearing his throat to prove his point I made us some waffles. Little did he know it was all a test. I completely studied him as he swallowed his food. He never winced, made a noise, or struggled to swallow his food. Then I offered him some medicine to help but he refused to take some so I decided then that he was faking. After breakfast he tried to get ready as slowly as humanly possible to insure that he was late. So as we pulled up to the school I tried as fast as I could to write a note for him to excuse him for being a few minutes late. I tried to get away it done without him seeing it. He read it & gave me the look. He said, "I don't like what you wrote. I'm not going to give it to her." So I said, "fine then you'll have detention (he knows there is no detention is elementary school right??)..have a good day loooove you!!" He didn't think it was as funny as I did. I sure love that boy. He is so funny. I am telling you he is a clone of his older brothers. Never wants to go to school!But that was a little insight into what getting Austin ready for school usually takes. Can't wait till my own kids act like this!! 

These are a few of my {New} favorite things!!

So I know I have been not so very good my blogging duties. I am sorry. Life is busy. I wanted to tell everyone about some amazing finds I have fell absolutely in LOVE with. All of these things I have had my eye on but just wasn't ready to loosen the purse strings just yet but I finally just went for it when I had a little extra money & it was so worth it.

Have any of you ever heard of Jaclyn Hill?? Well if you haven't let me tell you she is amazing. She is a total youtube makeup artist guru. She teaches you all these tips that she learned form going to MAC Makeup School & working for MAC for years. If your like me, I am not brave with my make up. I try new things & I end up hating it so I wipe it off then put my make up on like usual. When I do others make up for dances & weddings it turns out looking so great, then i try it on myself same situation I hate it on myself. I have rather large eyes accompanied by large eye lids. it creates problems believe it or not. Anyways I have always wanted some nice make up brushes. I had watched one of her youtube tutorials on brushes. She compared these Sigma Brushes with her Mac Brushes & said they are the same if not better for half of the price. I believe her. So i bought some & I LOVE THEM. Best thing I have ever bought myself. 

Sigma Beauty Make-up Brushes: They seriously are so amazing. The price can't be beaten. You can buy the brushes individually or in a kit. Like I said I absolutely love them. Best purchase ever. They apply the make up to my face to evenly & I have noticed I don't use as much make up as I was using before due to the quality of these brushes!

Urban Decay Naked 2: I love every single color in this palette. I am a very neutral toned lover when it comes to my make up. Shimmer & browns are always my go to so this palette was perfect for me. I have yet to try a silver & black smokey eye with it but that's my next brave moment to try. If you buy this I promise you won't regret it!!!

Maybeline Gel Eye Liner: This accompanied by my small angled Sigma brush makes for the most perfect lined eyes. This stays on all day, it's water proof & I never have to reapply!! I personally am not drawn to pencil eye liners, if I have a day where I just want to wear base, eye liner, & mascara the pencil eye liners get all over your eyelid by the end of the day. Not cute. So I started using liquid mascara & really liked them. But I am a perfectionist & you can get crazy if you accidentally bump yourself while applying it or put it on too fat when your in a hurry. This is the perfect happy medium between the pencil liners & liquid. I love it!!!

They're Real Mascara by Benefit: I bought this on a complete whim. I wasn't planning on having it but while I was in Sephora it was like it was calling my name. "Brittney you need to buy me. Your eyelashes need me." I talked myself out of it & walked around the store for a few more minutes then before I knew it i bought it. I seriously just had to have it. It''s the most expensive mascara I have ever bought but let me tell you it is absolutely amazing. I know a really big trend right now is eye lash extensions & I have thought about getting them but I am so afraid of them ruining my real lashes. I know a few people where the extensions totally thrashed their natural eye lashes & took so long for them to grow back in. In addition they are expensive & to keep them looking their best you usually have to get them filled every two weeks. So i took this approach. I do naturally have pretty long lashes but nothing is ever enough right?? My lashes are so much longer when I wear this, lasts all day, & doesn't flake. I have really loved what my lashes look like since I bought this. The brush is unlike any other mascara brush I have ever used.

Sigma Brushes can be found at www.sigmabeauty.com

The Naked 2 Palette & They're Real Mascaracan be found at Sephora

Maybeline eyeliner can be found at Walmart/Shopko etc. 

My wish list for my next paycheck :]

Nars Orgasm Blush

Nars Albatross Highlighter

Mother Knows Best

While some of my haircuts & hairstyles over the years have been very questionable at times, I know I have been blessed with the most amazing woman in the world to call my mother. From early on I knew my mom was cool in jr high when a guy friend of mine declared her as a "hot mom." Life is sometime hard when your moms a MILF. HAHAHAHA :]:]:]But I have been told by many boys that I will be a hot mom due to my mom being a hot mom. So I have that going for me!! But really if you know my mom you have very rarely, if ever seen her not made up. She is always perfect, not a hair out of place & does not like to be seen without make up on always. Whether she is camping or going to work my mom always tries to look her best. Not that she is vain or has something to prove to the world, she simply just likes to look her best at all times.

 Being my mothers only daughter I have had the privilege of having my mother be my best friend. What started from barbie dolls, dance lessons, & endless hours of watching Aladdin over & over, turned into constantly being together. I think I am with my mom more than I am with my husband. Not many daughters get to work with their mothers & live with them at the same time. Since getting married I don't live at home anymore but I do live maybe two minutes away from my moms house. We are constantly together. I'm at work with her daily, we go shopping together of course, we go to the dermatologist together, same with the dentist, eye exams, work errands, grocery shopping, concerts, chiropractor appointments, doctor appointments, back to school shopping for my little brother, visiting relatives in the hospital, we babysit Averie together, weekly dinner dates......you get the picture right?

 

I remember countless times around the age of sixteen saying "I will never be like my mom." Well sixteen year old me you totally jinxed yourself because every day I realize more & more that I am my mother's daughter. I am exactly like her & I am okay with it because she is one amazing woman. The lessons I have learned from her are countless. She has taught me so many things & still continues teaching me today. I have been blessed with such a great relationship with my mom. I couldn't imagine life without her.

To try & tell you the best thing you have ever taught me is hard but the one that I appreciate the most is teaching me how to be a hard worker. I know you were taught that from your amazing parents & I am grateful you passed that onto me. I know I was raised with a pretty comfortable life with you guys as my parents. I had nice things, I always had what I needed & a lot of what I wanted. I never paid for my car (besides gas), i never paid for my insurance, or my cell phone. While others may turn there nose up at this I would like to remind them of one thing. My family had worked for everything they have. My dad was laid off from a job he had for over ten years & we were close to loosing our house. My parents have worked so hard to build up there own business after this unforeseeable unemployment for my dad. My parents have owned & operated their business together now for five years. Instead of them telling me how to work hard, they show me. They have shown me all my life. I have watched them & seen how hard work pays off in life. Sometimes yes I wish my family was rich & money wasn't an issue. But I would rather work hard for the things I have in life instead of being handed everything I want. It was one of the things I wanted the most from my future husband & I got it. But I wouldn't have never been looking if you hadn't taught me.

I know they say a father is their daughters first love.....& I believe that along with our mothers being our first & longest lasting best friend from birth. So why I know when you start to grey & those small wrinkles on your gorgeous face...may or may not be my fault....know that I love you. All the love, all the fighting, all the lessons, all the fun, all the growing up has made me realize.....I love you more than words can express mom. I hope to one day be as beautiful, supportive, driven, reliable, wise, humble, comforting, loving mother that you have been to me. Thank you for everything you constantly do for me.

I must give another shout out to the woman I am blessed to have as my mother-in-law Trudy Bird:]. From day one she has welcomed me into her families life & made me feel apart of the family. She is the most easy going person I have ever met & she would give you the shirt off her back if you needed it. I will be forever grateful to her for the way she raised my husband. I know the reason why he is such an amazing man is because of her. Thank you for always being here for us & always making sure we know you are always there for us. I am happy to call you my mom:] She is truly a giver & I am lucky to have her!!!

Happy Mother's Day!!!