Marriage for Dummies

This is my absolute favorite quote about what marriage is. It describes my marriage with my husband, in fact just the other night we had a little fight before going to bed. As we both said what we needed to say, exchanged apologizes, & the cuddled to go to sleep. Chance sweetly said, "Do you know what I love about us? That not matter what we fight about I always know that we will be okay. That there is nothing that is going to make either of us just give up & walk out." Yes, I understand that we haven't been married that long, but guess what if you have that in your mind that no matter what you are not going to give up on this isn't that something everyone should do?? I feel like that is a great way to start off a marriage being on the same page. No we don't agree on everything & we fight. But we love each other more than we ever fight. I have been told all my life in your marriage you always learn new things, whether you have been married 25 years or 1 year, you along with your marriage continually grows. Through my own marriage & through the marriage of loved ones around me I feel like I have picked up on enough good knowledge to have a great marriage.

Having Real Expectations
Being married isn't always easy, it's not always fair, it's never perfect, & guess what it's not all about you. You are not better than your spouse you are equals & you have to compromise, even when you don't want to. Your life is not a movie, or a fairytale, it's real. Stop expecting your husband to be like those perfect men in your chic flicks. Be real, that's just what you do when you are in love. I think too many people now a days thinks that their spouse needs to give them this fairytale love story, & devote 110% of their time to them. All these girls have these unrealistic expectations of what a marriage is. A marriage is messy, fun, & sometimes aggravating, but at the end of the day it is a team effort. One person does not have all the responsibility to make you happy all of the time. That is such a huge burden to place on someone, especially your spouse & it is incredibly unfair. 

Compromise
Your spouse & you aren't identical in every aspect of life, guess what that is a good thing. Just because you both have different interests doesn't mean you can't do them together. You have to compromise, even when you don't want to. Stop making your spouse do everything you want to do, do you not see how extremely selfish that it? But just because you don't like that your spouse hunts, or plays video games, or likes sewing you do not have the right to demand that they can't ever do that again. No one wants to be married to someone who acts like they are your prison warden.

I-n-d-e-p-e-n-d-e-n-t do you know what that mean?
Yes I just pulled out lyrics from a Webbie song, not the best example but let's be honest I sing that song every time I spell out independent just like I sing Gwen Stefani when I spell out B-A-N-A-N-A-S, give me a break alright. But having independence in a relationship is key. Yes you have chosen to spend your entire life with this person but does that mean you both signed on to be together 24/7 365 days a year?? NO! I love my husband but I am the type of person who has to see my friends. It may not happen as much as it did before I was married but those relationships are important to me. I do not have to be with my husband all day long, yes there are some days that we are & I love it. But we both like having time to our selves. Whether it is watching my TV shows that Chance dislikes before he gets home from working late or letting him play video games while I watch, or watch netflix on my ipad, or my husband letting me go on a week vacation to Florida while he is off hunting with his dad. Time apart is good. You shouldn't be ditching your spouse every night of the week for your friends but it nice to have some time for you. If you are never apart how are you ever suppose to miss your spouse?

Get Off Your High Horse
You are not better than your spouse, so stop acting like it. End of story.
 My awesome friend shared this quote with me yesterday that he has in his home, "The perfect marriage begins when each other believes they got better than they deserve." You are not perfect, neither is your spouse so stop expecting them to be. Don't look down on your spouse because you think you are this big catch that they don't deserve. You better just sign those papers now & spare your spouse from dealing with your crap any longer.

You Marry Their Family Too
I had already made up my mind that when Chance & I got married I would try my best to spend time with both families especially on holidays. Yes it would be easier to choose my family over his every time but guess what I don't. Want to know why?? I love his family!! Even if I didn't like them,  I understand the importance of being around family. I think it is so selfish when it is always about one side of the family. You marry their family too so you better set apart time for all sides of each family or you will create problems. This goes back to learning that it's not all about you.

I am not saying that I am perfect, ask Chance he will tell you that I am not but I try. We are not perfect together but like I said at the end of the day we always know we will be okay. I understand things don't always work out between everyone so you make think it foolish of me to think that I know Chance & I will make it. Think what you like though, I think that is the right mind set before getting into a marriage & a great mindset to have throughout your whole marriage. Not thinking oh if this doesn't work out it's no big deal we can just get a divorce no big. If that is your mind set before getting married spare us all & move to Mexico so we don't have to deal with you. You have to work on a marriage each & everyday but that isn't so hard when you marry your best friend. I'm one of the lucky ones, I have a great marriage, a great husband & an even better life because of those two things. Pull your head out of your butt & you will too. :] hahaha but really.

One Year.

Since the day Chance stole my heart I dreamt about our wedding day & anticipated the sleepless night that accompanies it the night before. (& after HAHA!! ;]) I had spent a night before a wedding day with one of my friends who were getting married. Being so nervously excited she couldn't sleep so we were up all night & had minimal sleep. Then woke up very early for me to do her hair & then send her on her way. I assumed the night before my wedding would be just that. My last single night with a good friend being up all night due to the butterflies in my stomach. Instead I actually hung out with my fiance & family then went to bed. Of course I caught myself day dreaming & not feeling like this was real at all. I WAS GETTING MARRIED. Very quickly I fell asleep & you wanna know what?? I slept like a baby. (which was such a blessing since the next day was very long)

I woke calm. It felt weird to be so calm. I assumed I should be nervous with a bad case of butterflies stressing about every little detail......but I didn't. My amazing friend Melissa came over so early to do my hair for me. It was so nice to have a friend around just to talk with while getting ready just talking about old times. She told me that I was hands down the calmest bride she has ever seen. In that moment I realized it was more than just feeling calm. I felt secure, peaceful, happiness, & complete surety of the decision I was making to marry Chance. I had known since the day I met him he was different than the rest. Knowing that, I just knew that no matter what, today would be absolutely perfect. I had done all the planning I could do & I literally didn't care about the little thing or if everything went absolutely as planned. All I could think about was how lucky I was to be sealed to Chance in less than a few hours!!

Driving up the road to the Manti Temple was when the butterflies finally hit me. I jokingly told Chance, "I could still change my mind, I can still bail!" Accompanied by my amazing, worthy priesthood holding fiance we walked into that beautiful "princess castle." I can't even begin to tell you how sacred & beautiful ceremony was in front of parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, friends, & a special visit from someone I love & miss dearly. I was overwhelmed with emotion as I saw all these people here for us, just to be here with us as we were sealed for all time & eternity in our heavenly fathers house. Small, beautiful details such as the glow I felt I had, the way I couldn't seem to take my eyes off of my forever, the tears of joy from our parents, the glowing smiles from our mothers, the love & support from our loved ones, the feeling of my grandpa, are all things that I will always remember. Every simple detail about the sealing made this day more amazing than I could have ever imagined. 

To the one who means the absolute world to me, I just wanted to tell you that I love you. The day I you asked me to marry you I was the happiest girl in the world. You have changed my life more than anyone in my life. I know what the odds were saying about us ending up together. High school sweet hearts?? Not going to happen but lets add a mission to it to....HA that's IMPOSSIBLE. I had spent four years picturing our lives together & I could not think of a worse fate than living without you for the rest of my life. Thank you for being everything I need, always. This has been the greatest year of my life. I honestly tear up when I think of how lucky I am to have you. It still amazes me how kind hearted you are. Your compassion for others is outstanding. Thank you for being the most genuine, kind hearted person I have ever met. You are my best friend whom I share smiles, laughs, even sometimes tears & I can't wait to celebrate seventy two more anniversaries with you. Thank you for choosing me to share your eternity with. I love you more & more everyday. Knowing you are mine for time & all eternity......is the most beautiful dream that I never have to wake up from.

Happy Anniversary my love. Forever & always xoxo

Three girls, a weekend, & one Bieber.

I will admit at the beginning I came down with a bad case of "Bieber Fever" he was just thing adorable little ball of talent & why I still enjoy dancing to his music he is turning into such a little thug that it makes me sad. I just hope he doesn't end up like Lindsay Lohan. Standing next to my friends Maddi, & Paige I probably had the least fever. I was dancing the entire time, Paige was absolutely love struck. Just kept going on about how hot he was. While Maddi & I compared him to my 11 year old brother. It's so true though I'm sorry he has a little boy body. Pretty ripped arms for his body but he will get there soon. But I do love the Biebs. If I didn't I doubt I wouldn't have planned a Vegas trip to go see him. I am getting ahead of myself let's go back.

I got a text from my friend Maddi literally a week after we saw him in Salt Lake in January, about going to see him again in California or Vegas. I was just sitting there looking at the text thinking "dude, we JUST saw him." Pretty sure I may have actually said that to her. She was not happy. I was already planning a trip to Colorado for Country Jam with some other friends & didn't think I could pull off two trips in two weeks right in a row. Maddi being Maddi offered to pay for my entire trip just so she wouldn't have to go alone. I just couldn't do that so I just agreed to go & figured it wasn't until June so I would have plenty of time to save for both trips although I was sure my husband would kill me. After the line up was announced for Country Jam I decided not to go since it wasn't going to be that great. I was relieved because that meant more money for Vegas. Which turned out to not be very much so there is no way I could have swung two trips in two weeks time! 

We had two other friends who were planning on going but when the trip got close they ended up not being able to go. This posed a problem because only Maddi & I were going to the concert which left Paige who would be all alone in the hotel while we were at the concert. We literally invited everyone we could have but it just didn't work out for anyone even after they said they were in the next day it changed. We came to the conclusion that Paige would just get a ticket & come with us. The day we left we ended up finding a single ticket by the section next to us so we bought it & went on our way. We stayed in Mesquite one night, hung out at the pool for the day, then headed to Vegas. Wow it was so freaking hot. We actually had an extreme heat warning while we were there. I don't know how people live there. I don't think I could be a Mormon & live there. I literally melted like a popsicle in my G' but I did prove yet again you can wear garments & vacation in Vegas. You can even be modest & go dancing. Who would have known?? It is possible people!!

I will tell you that I have been to a ton of concerts but I don't think anything will top the ear shattering screams of all the girls in his concerts. I am sure any dogs in the vicinity were dying from the sound!! Surprisingly our seats turned out to be way better than we expected which is always awesome!!! Paige was pretty close to us not enough to talk over all the noise so we motioned that when JB comes out she was to come up & stand with us. It worked like a charm. She stood by us the entire time! We just staggered our standing & stayed within our two chair area. We stood up sang,  & danced the entire concert. Didn't sit down once, which was defiantly worth the sore feet after. When I went to the concert in Utah I left happy I went but it was nothing compared to Vegas! The sounds, the lights, everything was so much better. He puts on a very great show. Whether you like him or not you have to give it up to him that he is such a talented person. He is quite the musically inclined individual with awesome dancing skills! (& a hot bod if you ask Paige)

I am so glad I went because it was such a great concert & the entire weekend was fabulous. I don't think we ever went to bed before 2:00 am. Such a great vacation with two quite amazing friends who I love!! I was happy to get back home to my husband though. :] I missed him a lot.

Summer Lovin'

Who doesn't love Summer?? There is something about seeing little kids out riding their bikes, or selling lemonade that just brings a smile to my face. The feeling of complete freedom comes to mind when I think back to my summers when I was in school. There was nothing better than the last week of school where we did absolutely nothing then suddenly we are set free for three months. Summer isn't as freeing as I remember it being since I still work but it is still just as fun. This is my first married summer & as annoying as us newly weds are saying that....it defiantly changes things but in the best way possible. We have done more things together than any summer before & I love it. I love experiencing new things with my husband. I honestly don't know how long it will take me to get used to having our own room on family trips. Eventually it will become normal I suppose.

I'm playing catch up from a few weeks ago because I have been so incredibly busy with work & with fun. I have had a great summer so far!! We took the boat out for a day on the lake & it was perfect. Averie was an absolute doll. She loved the boat except when we stopped moving, she wasn't too fond of that but really who is? I have to breathe deeply every time we stop & are being smashed with waves so I don't get sick. She even fell asleep in my arms for a good forty five minutes. I tried so hard to keep her from rocking with the motions of the boat but she slept soundly until it got a little chilly so I decided to put a light jacket on her. Yeah THAT was what woke her up. Figures haha.

 Josh Turner Concert

 I also had the honor of attending a Josh Turner concert in Orem with Mckell, her mom, & her moms friends. I seriously look at how those ladies are & can't wait to be a fun mom. Mckell & I go to so many concerts with them!! They are our concert crew & it defiantly isn't the same without them. They are the funniest, sometimes crude, young women calling themselves GILFS, dancing with 22 year old guys. I mean they are a freaking RIOT!! You haven't really experienced a concert if you havne't gone with them. We stalk to tour bus after with them, who does that?? Oh we do!! haha 

When we went to meet him we were super rushed which was sad. What the hell do you say to a celebrity that you have five seconds with to take a picture with? Especially when the workers helping where so beyond rude. When it was our turn he says to us "how are you doing?" Could have died with how beautifully deep his voice was. Phew. We didn't really answer, we were a little star struck. We politely said hi, smiled for a picture & in his deep sexy voice he said, "thanks for coming". Nothing stellar....he didn't propose marriage to me but it was still awesome. I still completely regret not sneaking a butt grab in though. If you don't know what I am referring too click here to read another butt grabbing celebrity moment Mckell & I shared. 

Anyways Josh Turner is a great entertainer, he put on a fantastic show!! I feel that I have been to so many concerts that I am spoiled & so picky about them. If they aren't dancing around or engaging the crowd I don't enjoy it as much. But Josh Turner did that the whole time. Damn his voice goes low. He sounds just like he does recorded, if not better. Just beautiful. I wanted to just die when he sang a cover of Billy Deans (touched his butt too) "I Wouldn't Be a Man". & how cute is this, his wife is the keyboardist & back up singer. So adorable you could just tell he was a good man. Family orientated & a christian man. It's safe to say I fell in love!! I would pay big bucks to see him again.

California Dreamin'

I am writing this post from somewhere deep down, a sad, tired, Monday morning after an entire week off on a beach. I can't even begin to tell you how hard it was for me to get out of bed & get myself to work this morning.. I just spent the last week in California in a beach house at Capistrano Beach. Chances entire family goes on this trip every year. They stay at the same beach house every time mostly because they buried all of their ocean toys in the sand when we leave. Then the next year when we get there they dig up the boogie boards & all the toys. There were twenty one of us there & we had so much fun. Here is a run down of what happened down in Cali!!!

All 21 of us flew from Salt Lake City to Long Beach. I am so happy we don't drive. I honestly love to fly. It's such a cool feeling & it gives me butterflies. My adorable cousin Brooks had a Jet Blue mustache the whole flight!! 

We made it to the beach house & the water was as beautiful as I remembered it. Capistrano is a private beach for residents & guests of the beach houses. It makes it so nice to not be at an over populated beach fighting for a spot to lay. We just walk out of the house & this is our backyard. How lucky are we??

Sunday we attended a California ward that met at 9:00 a.m. Little early for vacation right?? We were planning on going to the 11:00 a.m. sacrament meeting but found out it was a Spanish speaking ward. So with a 45 minute warning to get ready we amazingly made it on time!! I wish I had a that beautiful view of the ocean when I walked out church every Sunday!!!

  Laying out & playing on the beach was so relaxing. The weather was perfect. It was hot but laying next to the beach you get that coastal breeze....oh it was heaven. These to little fishes lived in the water!! You seriously rarely saw them out of it. The day we arrived they jumped in the water in their normal clothes because they were too excited!! Brooks, Maisy & I had fun jumping over the waves, boogie boarding, building sandcastles & having my bury them in the sand. There is never a dull moment with these two.

Tuesday morning we went & spent the morning doing baptisms at the New Port Temple. It was such a great experience. Chance had the opportunity of confirming & doing twenty baptisms with me.

We went to dinner at this adorable Italian restaurant in San Clemente with Chance's parents & brother. Then we walked down to the pier to look over the water. It was so beautiful, we watched the surfers on the water. It really is chilling sometimes to just look out at the water & see it just continue on forever.

Bird Sanctuary get it?? haha

Wednesday was spent at none other than the always fun DISNEYLAND. Sadly it was so freaking busy. It was graduates night so the park was packed! But we still had so much fun! Cars Land was the most adorable thing ever!!  The day after I woke up my feet were still sore, my throat was still sore from screaming, but I still had a smile on my face from how fun it was!!!

Thursday night all the boys (minus Chance's Dad & Cody) plus me (the only girl) went to the Angels vs. Dodgers game at angels Stadium. It was so much fun. This was my third MLB game I have ever been to & I loved every minute of it. While all of our family was cheering for the Dodgers Chance & I were voting for the Angels. The Angels ended up winning 3-2. The crowd we were sitting with man they were entertaining. I would say the stadium was close to 50% Angel fans & 50% Dodgers fans. There was a lot of chanting & yelling which only got louder the more beer everyone had!!

We brought Taylor to the game:]

 Sadly our trip had come to an end & we were packing up before we knew it. I had so much fun on our trip! I can tell you I'm still not back in the work groove & it's Thursday haha but I know that California will be waiting for us next year & only one more Cali trip without Taylor!!!! I am so excited for the next trip that beach is calling my name!!